Matt Bors
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The Cleveland Slim Jims vs. Buffalo Bank Ones

Red Bull buys MetroStars, renames team

NEW YORK - The MetroStars never reached the championship game in their first 10 Major League Soccer seasons. Now their history is but a memory.

Energy-drink manufacturer Red Bull Company Limited purchased the MetroStars on Thursday from the Anschutz Entertainment Group and renamed the team "Red Bull New York," effective immediately.

Monday's comic will be about the South Dakota abortion ban (in a way), but now that I see this I may have to pump out two to speculate on the name changes of other sports teams as this trend expands. What's next? band names? Human Beings themselves? Don't laugh, it'll happen.

The article is complete with an ad for the new five bladed Fusion razor that claims it is "the best shave ever." I'm about to sue them for false advertising, the Divine Iron has been proven in multiple test-studies to be the smoothest.
03.09.2006 |