Matt Bors
Comics, Politics & Ridicule

Newt Opens Up



Newt Gingrich is a superb debater. Perhaps he honed his skills pitching open marriages to his previous wives. Think what you will of the man, he was totally rocking it in the CNN debate. The crowd gave a standing ovation to his slap down of John King for delving into his personal life.

One can easily imagine Obama having a white wife–his third–twenty-some years younger than him, children from a previous marriage, and history of serial philandering being considered off limits by conservatives.

It would be nice if the media or a politician actually acknowledged that open marriages and relationships are actually OK normal things to do and that anything outside of hetero monogamy death pacts don’t reek of deviancy and degeneration.

Of course, Gingrich denies even asking for an open marriage and, in a way, he’s right. Gingrich wasn’t pursuing some kind of open, honest relationship with mutual love and respect–he was caught in a six year affair, wanted it to continue without interruption, and gave his wife an ultimatum: I continue to bang the woman much younger than you and you stay home and watch Murphy Brown.

She chose the option that involved never having sex with Newt Gingrich again, which I can’t imagine leads one to be haunted with regret.

Previously: Newt 2012. Wednesday: SOPA”

01.23.2012 |
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